Malaysian Taxi Drivers

There's a point where taxi drivers go insane. Or hairless and buff. And start playing air-guitar, then flexing their well toned biceps, then proceeding to growl "chi ching ching ching" in a death metal style to an 80's Malaysian rock song - but then again all Malaysian songs sound like 80's rock songs don't they? - and then cutting the air with one hand like he's rapping like Dr Dre or Eminem and thank God he hasn't gone and grabbed on his balls... and it's STILL the weird ass old song playing on the radio.

There was one driver who wouldn't stop clearing his throat and making raspy noises.

There was one who wouldn't stop making licking noises.. like when your mouth is dry and you act like a fish. Or as we say "anga keun".

There was the one who told me he would drop me to uni every morning, but the next day his dog died and he never recovered from it.

There was the old chinese guy who spoke 5 words of English, hard of hearing and wanted to argue with me where Setia Jaya KTM station was, he thought I didn't know that it was the Seri Setia station that was behind the Guiness brewery and that he was trying to rip me off by driving around? PFFT...!

Then there was the one who also told me he would drop me to uni every morning, then went on to tell me how pretty I am about 4 or 5 times, and finally that he was an ex-mafia guy.

PINK

pink. the color of my heart.

the love bite on my neck.

pink. the color of your tongue.

in real only a lighter red.

pink. the shade of your skin on that photo.

and on the lips of your lover.

Dear Self Loathing Imbeciles

A note to all egomaniac, insecure, self-loathing and people hating freaks of nature; you are not God, you are not Godsends, you do not own people and furthermore neither does God. There are an endless stream of insults I can still come up with but so much negativity is really tiring.

If you feel the need to exercise your self-given power over your so-called loved one, making them bend over backwards, cut off ties with their friends, meaningless ex-flings, show you their phone and internet history, accuse them of things that have never happened, spread lies about them and their friends to the point the poor person is now buying anti-depressants strips faster than a crack addict shoots up and have lost weight like an anorexic, you are fucking ridiculously insane. Nobody owns anyone, get over yourself.

And to those morons who are hopelessly devoted to these narcissistic, selfish people, I may have called you 'poor' before, but I don't really mean it. I can empathize to a certain point but I am pretty sure we all have limits yeah? Your happiness comes first. You are not a dog on a bloody leash. You don't roll over when you're told to roll over. You don't sit when you're told to sit. You don't run after the friggin bone when they say 'fetch'.

I hope you know we are all free human beings. I deserve my happiness, you deserve yours. I have my peace and so should you.

Grow the fuck up.

Day 1

Observation - Still numb, I assume. There have been no clear, salty saline solutions, much like last year. No need for edibles with a 4-day binge on Bali cuisine in Indonesia. Does one need an associate to validate one's life? First to set priorities straight. Bali cuisine. THAT's where my priorities lie.

A friend just told me about Melody Gardot so I checked out the following song by her aaanndd... fell in love as I fell out of love... or as I swum around with love... or as I let it suffocate me. Beautifully written poetry is always well appreciated, and her voice and lyrics did justice to music and to whatever genre her music is classified as.

Artist        Melody Gardot

Song        Our Love is Easy

YouTube  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkBuxeIsXDo&feature=related

Lyrics       http://www.metrolyrics.com/our-love-is-easy-lyrics-melody-gardot.html

It made me imagine in black and white, zooming in on the picture in slow motion. A girl smoking her cigarette, lying on the sofa, mingling with the shadows in this dark room where the only shard of light comes through the gap between the two curtains. A lazy Sunday... a hazy love of confusion.

Not Unpertubed

She tried to drink her troubles away, she tried to smoke up her sadness into vapor

She made friends with everyone

And painted their days gold

She talked to people, she talked to herself, she talked to God and she talked to the walls

She lay in bed, not unperturbed

And drew orb-like flowers

As days went by and she grew older, felt she was getting wiser but just only colder

Numbers didn't matter, nor did people

For coloring her world was not needed

She drank until her fears haunted every childhood, teenage and adult memory

Until the nightmares failed to leave

And until her eyes finally closed

Sigur Ros : Svefn-G-Englar

19.02.2011 : The day I walked out of work before my working hours ended officially and plopped down on top of a stuffed bear to watch "Svefn-G-Englar" by Sigur Ros. I must thank Nurt for showing it to me - I actually think I might have gone through life without watching the video... an unforgettable, and award winning video I don't think anyone should miss out on.

Svefn-G-Englar seems to be a play on words, translating to "sleepwalkers" or "Sleep Angels".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zQ5Grncdjlc
Directed by August Jacobsson and featuring the Reykjavik's Perlan Theatre Group


What made the video special for me at first were the quotes that appeared on the lower right hand corner of the screen. They were words that had been unimaginably beautifully uttered and had left their traces in the ever invisible, intangible weightless atmosphere of thoughts and memories.

The quotes... they made perfect sense and to me, couldn't have been said any better. I am not even going to write any comments or thoughts or feelings about the first three as I am pretty sure the words are so strong in their own sense, and so naked in its meaning that there's little room left for confusion or even disagreement.

I took the liberty of writing them down here, the first four are my favorites and placed in preferred order. The rest, as they appear in the video.

[the below list was amended today - #2 was originally #9, and the previous quote that was at #2 is now at #5]

1. “Without music, life would be a mistake” - Nietzcne

2. “In the end I think of music as saving grace for all humanity” – Henry Miller

3. “A painter paints pictures on canvas. But musicians paint their pictures on silence” – Leopold Stokowski

4. “See deep enough, and you see musically; the heart of nature being everywhere music” – Thomas Carlyle

NOTE ABOUT 4. : This one made me think about one of my... what can I say... ideas? perceptions? thoughts? a realization? that I had a couple of months ago... perhaps even a year ago... I can't recall exactly but - it came to my notice that I hear and register a lot of things in beats and rhythms. It could be the filing of a nail in a salon, the hammering and metal works at a construction site, the ringing clinks of cutlery, footsteps - running or walking - and even the hum of engines on a motorbike, a car or some other vehicle.

I sometimes wished I could separate the noises into different files like you do in a recording program where it lets you record music in multi-tracks. I bet if that happened, that when all the sounds we hear around us are broken down to different tracks, we would find and see that each did have it's own special rhythm and it is simply difficult to hear it amidst the chaos of everyday life.

I wondered after reading this whether that was along the lines of what Thomas Carlyle had meant.


5. “Music was invented to confirm human loneliness” – Lawrence Durrell

6. “Music is the shorthand of emotion” – Leo Tolstoy

7. “Music expresses that which cannot be said on which it is impossible to be silent” – Victor Hugo

8. “Music is a moral law. It gives soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination, and charm and gaiety to life and to everything” – Plato

9. “Music can name the un-nameable and communicate the unknowable” – Leonard Bernstein

10. “Music is well said to be the speech of angels; in fact, nothing among the utterances allowed to man is felt to be so divine. It brings us near to the infinite” – Thomas Carlyle


What then made the video special for me, will come in another post.

New found subject

It's yet another rainy day in Male'... puddles, raincoats, umbrellas and people without raincoats or umbrellas rushing around with various objects covering their heads... plastic bags, paper bags, a book, a set of papers or both their hands... and the monsoon never seemed to end. Perhaps as the ancient Mayans had predicted, the world is going to deplete in 2012 and this was her way of letting us know the end is nearing, and to slowly start preparing for it. But how do we prepare for that I wonder? Obviously I for one, have many dreams yet to accomplish, and many exotic, breathtaking places to travel and conquer.

As usual, wandering thoughts of my mind has lead me to talk about something very unrelated to what I originally titled this post for and wanted to write about. Hence instead, I shall talk about this new found subject. <-- I wrote to that point on 27 Sep 10 and now I am wondering whether the new found subject was the world ending in 2012 or my dreams of jet-setting. Hmm...